Skip to content

You may be pregnant and have many questions about breastfeeding. Or maybe you have a colleague on maternity leave; and you wonder if breastfeeding will affect her return to work ... you too have an important role. How? Read here! A reflection on breastfeeding, its benefits; its importance to society, and our role to play..

Breastfeeding, simple as it sounds..
Breastfeeding, simple as it sounds..

I'm pregnant.. should I think about breastfeeding now?

My children are born in France. It was then when I truly felt the strongest cultural differences with Italy. My boss, while I was pregnant, asked me if I thought I would breastfeed. The question puzzled me a bit: why was it not obvious that I would at least try breastfeeding? Did he just want to know if I would have stayed home on parental leave longer than expected?

Many other people asked me the same question and I understood that it was without malevolence. In France, women claim their independence, acquired when baby's bottle was freed from its intrinsic concept of guilt, inadequate mother; and they were able to choose whether to breastfeed or not.

The switch to artificial milk makes it easier to distribute the tasks related to feeding the baby with the partner; to come back work earlier, and not to depend on baby's needs for a long time (I'm obviously simplifying a bit).

In Italy, I think we don't ask ourselves the question as much. If it's possible, then breastfeeding is considered normal. The choice is perhaps less free from cultural conditioning ...

But I found it absolutely natural to wanting to take care of my creature with breastfeeding. In addition, I have always heard that breast milk is healthier, transmits antibodies, contains all the nutrients the child needs.

Too bad no one warned me that .. it's not that simple!

Moms-to-be (but why not, partners and bosses ): five things to know about breastfeeding

  1. It's painful. Only the first days, but know it. Better to arm yourself with patience - it's just for a short time. And with a nice protective cream for nipples (On the advice of my midwife, I used Medela's Purelan; I haven't tried any other, so I can't compare, but it certainly works well. )

  2. Better to drink like camels before a trip to the desert. Like a lot of water, really liters and liters. It will seem obvious ... well ... it wasn't for me at the time, as I will tell you below.

  3. The double electric breast pump will save you. It will make you feel like a dairy cow, but it'll become a valuable ally. Ask for advice, rent it in the pharmacy, prepare yourself psychologically, but don't ever neglect it!

  4. Unless you want to lock yourself home, be ready to breastfeed in public. Find the most appropriate solutions for the situation, but don't worry about any eventual disapproving look.

  5. If you are planning to go back to work and continue breastfeeding, get ready for fatigue and guilt, because you will suddenly live on two fronts .. well, in fact, this will long exceed breastfeeding!

  6. Ok I'll add a sixth one.. It is, truly, a wonderful bonding experience. I'm not regretting any single bit of it..

Come on, let's go into more detail. I'll start by telling you how it went for me, and why I find breastfeeding so important to us all.

...continue reading "Breastfeeding. Joys, pains, and society"

How can I help my children sleep? You may have wondered, like me, from time to time.. It's one of the most recurring topics among parents right? Do your children struggle to find their sleep, and you struggle with the urge of running miles away? Let's take a closer look!

How can I help my children sleep
Children's sleep

Children's sleep is heaven. When they sleep! How can I help my children sleep then?

If you have children, or have spent time with them, you have probably experienced the relief that floods you when you close the door of their room in the evening, imagining a few hours of adult life just for you, or for your couple.

And you probably all know the thrill that runs through your back when you hear a "Moooom, Daaaad, I can't sleep! I'mm thirsty! Please come!"

At first you pretend not to have heard, but after 2 minutes the little voice has become a loud cry and at some point you need to avoid waking up the whole neighborhood  ..

So you get up, and you hope to fix it in a few minutes. But your child's eyes are wide open and, based on his energy level, he could go hiking up a  mountain .. not quite willing to stay alone in the dark. Children's sleep becomes a nightmare.

You stay a little longer, then try to leave the room again, and there it is. This loud cry, the weeping cry. In your head, the fight : on one hand, I want to finish my film ! (or tidy up the kitchen / talk with your friends who came for a drink / go to sleep / anything else) but on the other, Poor honey, look at his big tears .. I can't just leave him like that ..

And depending on your fatigue level and empathy, one of these thoughts will move you in one direction or the other .. with its consequences.

When children's sleep moves deep, personal issues

...continue reading "How can I help my children sleep? How to handle it, smooth!"

1

If you often feel tensed and stressed; you are running all the time, and don't even know why. If you sometimes snap at your children for no reason.. or simply, you often find yourself holding your breath.. This article may interest you! We'll see how, when you breathe correctly, you may improve your life in unsuspected ways. 

Children know how to breathe and enjoy life more
Children know how to breathe and enjoy life more

Why should I pay attention to how I breathe?

Let's be honest. How many times a day do we think about our breath?

To the importance of breathing, and to the existence of different techniques to breathe, I payed attention only when I started taking singing lessons. I was 20.

I was taught what the diaphragm is, and how difficult it is to reproduce certain sounds in a melodic and melodious way without the right support with proper musculature, posture and breathing. Before, breathing was something I just did not ever think about.

In order to sing, I had to focus on my breath. I then realized how many times anxiety and nervousness, made me breathe up high to the chest; and how ventral "low" breathing  conciliated instead a state of calm. This is quite physiological since the increase of the respiratory rate is a response to stress (the so called "fight or flight response").

It still surprises me. Why in the world do we encounter so many difficulties as adults to just breathe? I mean, it's such a natural mechanism! Children and animals do it right effortlessly. But as we grow, we disconnect so much from ourselves, we forget. And then we need to pay attention and to exercise to relearn..

Connected: 6 things any parent should know about stress

...continue reading "Breathe… Why it helps you stay calm and present"

Have you ever felt like being nice to other people made you do things you didn't actually want? Have you ever felt scared when you had to say no to somebody? Afraid of being rejected?
If that's the case, you may want to read this ! I'm going through the same path too, and it could be great to share some advice!

Say no is like climbing
Say no is like climbing

Say no. What?!

It took me years to realize that, well, I have a problem. I can't say no. Friends or colleagues ask me a favor? Of course I'll help ! People ask me to do things I absolutely don't want to do for the sake of me? Here I am anyways!

But hey, either I'd force myself into it, or I'd find an incredible excuse to justify my no. And then I'd feel guilty for hours, or sometimes days.

I became so good at this, I hadn't even realized I would actually convince myself into changing my mind and believing that the other person's option was a better one. I would just forget whatever reason it was for which I didn't want to comply in the first place.

...continue reading "Say no! Why you may want to learn that right now"

Who's never experienced to get up feeling organized, efficient, in control, and full of time ? A clear schedule in your head, and feeling positive about everything? A morning where you feel balanced and strong. In power. You savor a zen morning with the kids, breakfast together and some cuddles, before getting to work..

Then, this whole zen morning with the kids in your head, you wake your wonderful creatures up, and a few moments later, see this powerful feeling of control crumble and transform into exasperation..Raise your hands!!!

zen morning with the kids
Children getting ready

A typical zen morning with the kids

When I enter my children's room, seeing their cute little faces full of sleep,fills me up with tenderness (also read : under the effect of oxytocin). So I start dressing them up, I wake them slowly slowly with kisses and caresses. I listen to them while they're telling me their dream. They usually make them up on the spot... It sounds like "my lollipop turned into mud", or "my bed turned into a leaf", and so on. I smile and feel the luckiest mum of all.

Then we go in the kitchen, I sit with them while they take breakfast, we chuckle. We stay quietly together, until I decide it's time to activate phase number 2 : pee, teeth brushing, washing hands and face, give a hug to daddy still in bed, and then coats and scarfs and go.

The zen morning with the kids you had in mind transforms into catastrophe

My balanced, happy self, my sense of control, disappear in an eye blink.

My daughter jumps in bed with daddy and do not want to move into the bathroom for the sake of her. Then, when I finally get her to do it, she doesn't want to sit in the toilet. In the meanwhile, I've finished washing her brother and need to bring him to his bedroom to get him dressed, only she does not want to stay in the bathroom on her own...

...continue reading "Zen morning with the kids : get your kids out and be on time to work"

Before I even get started, I want to make clear what my mission is. Why do I write. How can I serve you.

why-this-blog-framework
A framework - Photo by Jessica Ruscello on Unsplash

Who am I and what's this blog about?

I am a parent who's been there (and still am actually!).

A mom who's found herself yelling at their kids, and then felt guilty. Who went to work leaving a crying baby behind, not knowing her whys anymore.

A person who's tried to make everyone happy, and then wouldn't know why she was unhappy at times.

...continue reading "Mission Statement – why do I write ?"

On this website we use first or third-party tools that store small files (cookie) on your device. Cookies are normally used to allow the site to run properly (technical cookies), to generate navigation usage reports (statistics cookies) and to suitable advertise our services/products (profiling cookies). We can directly use technical cookies, but you have the right to choose whether or not to enable statistical and profiling cookies. Enabling these cookies, you help us to offer you a better experience.